Blogging at 25 Feet
Tuesday, May 18th, 2004I *should* be blogging at around 35,000 feet, but takeoff’s been delayed (either a cargo door wasn’t properly closed, or else the switch saying so is faulty), and we’ve sitting on the tarmac for over 30 minutes waiting for the all-clear. Since it seems it might be a while yet, I figured I’d unstow my iPAQ and start composing a blog entry.
[Utterly Mundane Technical Aside: My stupid iPAQ somehow (?) underwent a hard reset last week, after which I restored from my most recent backup, then re-synchronized. But I think I forgot to reinstall the driver for my folding keyboard, so I'm doggedly scribbling this entry using my stylus, despite the keyboard sitting on my tray table. Sigh.]
[Aside #2: Pilot just came on over the intercom - latch is closed, sensor is faulty, crew is working on faulty sensor. Pilot also mentioned that San Jose just beat out Calgary to tie the series at 2 games apiece. And no, I still don't care about hockey.]
Okay, our Toronto trip is over, except for the return flight. I’ll try to jot down the highlights before I pass out…
[Aside #3: Aloft at last - over an hour late, but whatever. And I hauled out my notebook long enough to re-install my keyboard driver. Ahhh. And no, the notebook doesn't QUITE render the iPAQ and its keyboard redundant - the latter fits better on my tiny tray table, is quiter (no fan), gets better battery life, and is easier to move out of the way (and back) whenever Em has to climb over me to go pee. Which can be often.]
First off, my father is stable, but still in critical care. He definitely *looks* muh better than he did the last time I saw him (in Florida), despite the fact that he’s been through a lot since then. The frustrating part is that he’s been in hospital for around four months now, and his condition is, in some fundamental ways, pretty much unchanged over the last few months. We hope his insides (particularly his pancreas) are healing up, but we just don’t know for sure… In any case, it’s slow going. At least he’s still fighting. And he was (at least at times) fully awake and alert and aware, which I didn’t see in Florida. On the other hand, that made leaving him today that much harder. I just keep telling myself (and Em keeps telling me) that we’ll soon be celebrating his move out of Critcal Care and into a regular hospital room. I’ve also been telling my mom the same thing. All of this has been particularly hard on her. All in all, my parents are both holding up as well as can be expected. It was really good to be able to see them both again, even though leaving today was very, very difficult.
The other reason for the trip was to get a new TN-1 “work authorization” for Emylene. We call it “the annual visa renewal trip”, but an immigration inspector just informed us that, technically, it’s *NOT* a visa, but a “work authorization”. Okay. Whatever. The good (great?) news is that Em got her visa - um, I mean her work authorization - and that this was far and away the easiest one EVER. After she indicated her intent to apply for a new visa, we were escorted to the usual waiting room by an agent who handed off Em’s paperwork (she prepares it all well in advance). We waited for a while, somewhat nervously - we got to see another applicant leave in a pretty bad mood, his application (we can safely assume) having been denied. Anyhow, after not-too-long of a wait, an agent came out of an office and called Em’s name, then asked if she had her $50 filing fee. She paid up, and the agent went away for a minute, then came back with her new visa. Not only was no one ever mean to either of us at any point in the process, but no one even asked her a single question. We’ve both been through this process a number of times, and the experience has varied from straightforward to nightmarish for both of us, but this was the best it’s ever been. Em was having a good day for dealing with men in uniform, let me tell you…
Oh, yes. That reminds me. Em was PULLED OVER FOR SPEEDING (can you say “75 km/h in a 50 km/h zone”?) while we crossed the Bloor Street Viaduct on our way to pick up our friend Frank. As usual, she batted her innocent little doe eyes at the nice officer, and he let her go with nothing more than a *warning*. Personally, I’d have let her stew in a holding tank overnight to gain a better appreciation for posted speed limits, and the satisfaction that comes from obeying laws that exist to protect our lives, the lives of our friends, and even the lives of the innocent strangers we might plough into as we hurtle recklessly across urban viaducts. But this officer was obviously a big softie, and had no way of knowing (as I know, alas, too well) that beneath Em’s notorious cute-and-tiny exterior, there lurks the heart of a lead-footed scofflaw. I wonder if Mothers Against Cute Drivers has a San Francisco chapter?
In other news, today (May 16th) is my brother Rammy’s birthday - he’s 47. Happy Birthday, Ram!! [No, he doesn't read this blog - I just enjoy typing out loud.]
Geez, I’m tired. I think we averaged about 5 hours of sleep per night over the last week in Toronto. Up early to be at the hospital early, dinner with family (most nights) after the hospital, then downtown to be out late catching up with friends. Lather, rinse, and repeat the following day. Rewarding, and in some ways unavoidable, but REALLY tiring. And if the best current science is to be believed, I’m now carrying around a sleep deficit that it’ll take a week of early nights to get rid of. Joy.
[Aside #4: I'm half-watching the in-flight move, "The Big Bounce". Pretty stupid, despite being based on what's probably a decent Elmore Leonard story. But there's one scene I just noticed where Owen Wilson is playing dominoes with Morgan Freeman, Willie Nelson, and Harry Dean Stanton. Nice.]
We started the trip out tired - we took a red-eye Monday night, and got in to Toronto earlyTuesday morning. We drove to Brampton to see Em’s mom, and crash out (well, I crashed out, anyhow) for a bit. Then we went for lunch with Em’s mom and sister at (where else?) Swiss Chalet. After that it was off to the hospital to see my dad, and meet up with my mom. From the hospital, we did dinner with my mom at (where else?) Sababa’s Restaurant. Oh, that lentil soup… After the Sababa experience, we did a Starbucks run, and brought some of the caffeinated booty over to Eddy’s place - he wasn’t there (he and Rammy were out of town), but we got to see Heidi, Reanna, Shane, and too many cats and birds to enumerate here. Finally, after all that, we trekked it out to our hotel to check in, watch some TV, and pass out.
Wednesday we got up early (ouch) to get to the hospital early. From there, Em went to hang out with Tina and Derek, while I hung out with my mom some more. After which my mom and I swung by Eddy’s place again - this time Eddy was back from his trip. I dropped my mom (and her car) off at her place, and Em picked me up from there to head to the hotel. I still hadn’t seen anyone but family, but was still too tired and drained to think of heading downtown just yet…
Thursday night, the whole Rochman clan (less the patriarch, obviously and sadly) got together at Eddy’s place for a barbecue feast. Mmmm. Em swung by towards the end of that and picked me up so that we could head downtown to Reid and Carloyn’s place (we finally got to see it!!). As an added bonus, Kathy (alas, the poor girl has no website to call her own) and Carlos made it over, so the six of us got to hang out in a totally cozy space for a while - plus, the weather was perfect. Best of all, we convinced Reid to give us a command performance of a couple of tunes from the new CD. I picked “Grass and Dirt” - it’s my favorite track on the CD by a slim margin, but the live/slow/solo/acoustic rendition we got was, of course, FANTASTIC. Too bad I didn’t tape it… Em picked “Starting to Learn“. The arrangement on the CD was already lean, but it’s still so much more beautiful when you see and hear it live like that. It’s pretty cool to have friends who can simply pick up a nearby guitar and then proceed to blow you away with their playing and singing. Hopefully, Reid will play some gigs here in San Francisco soon. 
Friday night we headed downtown to see Michelle & Norm, and the condo they moved into a little while back. When we got there, I realized that I had actually BOUGHT a condo in that same building, around years ago, back when it was still just a blueprint and a sales office. I ended up letting go of it almost right away, when I decided to move out to California. But it was weird to be standing roughly where I might be living today if I hadn’t moved to San Francisco instead. It was also weird to be inside the real thing, when up to that point I’d only ever been inside of a model unit. The good news is that it’s a great place, and their condo looks beautiful. From there, we walked over to the immortal Swatow on Spadina, since we’d been longing for real “Spadina & Dundas” Chinese food. While it was good, it wasn’t AS good as we remembered - we wondered if our memories were rose-tinted, or if the place had gone downhill. I still think the latter. After Swatow, Em headed off with Michelle & Norm in search of chocolate cake (it seems Lettieri got a facelift, and started opening up in suburban malls, but still has yummy cakes), while I strolled over to The Last Temptation in Kensington Market to meet the X’athies (that is, Cathy and Kathy). Congrats to Cathy on finishing law school - slacker! Carlos and Steve Barber (Yay! We DID get to see Barber this time! Even though he has no cell phone, and a new home phone number every 20 minutes or so. Ahem.) came by after a bit, and we all got to sit on the patio and drink and talk and get silly. Ah, good times. It got a little chilly as it got later, but nothing really - the point is that Canadians know how to appreciate a patio, and it seemed like old times. Em came by later, and hung out for a bit, but then it was time to call it a night again.
On Saturday, Em and I went to the hospital as usual, and then Em went to Brampton to spend some more time with her family. Later on, we all met up at Sababa’s (yes, again). By “all” I mean me, Em, my mom, both my brothers, their wives, and all of their kids except Ariel (who was working hard at Canada’s Wonderland, making Bubble Tea for the masses). It was a nice enough dinner, by noisy-dinner-with-my-family standards, and I got a few good pictures out of it to boot. It also doubled as a pre-party for Rammy’s birthday, since we figured (correctly, as it turns out) that we wouldn’t get to see him the next day (his actual birthday) since we had so much ground to cover, and he had a Bar Mitzvah to go to. But we got him a David Grossman book (”The Yellow Wind“) that looks really good - we haven’t read it ourselves yet, but Em read and enjoyed Grossman’s “See Under Love“. After Sababa, we drove down to Arnon & Rowan’s place (I hadn’t seen Arnon in years, although we’ve known each other since we were around eight or nine years old). We saw their cool new condo digs (everyone seems to have cool new condo digs these days!), and then proceeded to stuff ‘em in our rental car and drive ‘em down to Queen and Soho, so we could stroll over to the Friar & Firkin. According to a hastily constructed plan, a bunch of people managed to come by and join us over the course of the night: Reid, Carlos, Kathy, Agent Dan, Derek, and Tina. An oddball mix (my favorite kind, really), but there was quite a bit of drinking, and much rejoicing. We got in VERY late. Sigh. Grin. Sigh. I think I can still feel that tequila shot…
Sunday morning, we got up earlyish to pick up Frank near his place, and then head out to The Purple Onion (near Keele and St. Clair) to meet Heather (another person I haven’t seen in YEARS), Heather’s fiance Mike, and Em’s old friend Lisa Zoppas for breakfast. It was nice to finally (start) getting caught up with Heather, and (among much other news) it came up that she had never tried “Googling” someone - that is, typing that person’s name into an internet search engine such as Google. So, for the record, Heather’s full name is Heather Dee Marsh. Since Google crawls my blog, we now know that a search on “Heather Dee Marsh” should eventually bring back at least ONE hit. It was great to get caught up with Heather (if only for just a bit) after all these years. Also great to see Frank and Lisa again, and to meet Mike. Unfortunately, we all had to head out too soon. Some folks had to work - yes, on Sunday - and we had to get over to the hospital to see and say goodbye to my dad. But it was another fun gathering - and unfortunately, the last such of the trip.
[Small World Story: I was prompted to call Heather because I ran into her mother (well, she ran into me) in the waiting area of the Critical Care Unit at North York General Hospital. Ken was recovering from surgery there, in a room just down the hall from my dad's. The good news is that Ken's surgery was basically preventative, and went very well, and I understand he's recovering nicely.]
After The Purple Onion, we went to the hospital to see my dad. I won’t go too far into it, but leaving was hard. Harder than Florida, even, because this time I knew for sure that he knew we were there, and that we were leaving. I also know he understands, and that the rest of my family is out there, but… It was still hard.
From the hospital, we made one last stop in Brampton. Huge Thanks to Em’s mama for all the sewing work - we now have new pillow covers, and some of my sleeves and pant legs are now the right length.
As usual, the trip was way too short. We didn’t have enough time to spend with my dad, nor other family, nor friends, nor just experiencing Toronto again. But it was still a great trip. I’m looking forward to the next one, and looking forward to seeing my dad up and around again then. We’ll be back around Halloween (if not sooner) for Dalia’s bat-mitzvah. And all you folks who promised to come visit us out here (you know who you are!) had better start making plans.
PS-to-Cathy: The trip from here to the South Rim Visitor Center of the Grand Canyon takes just 13 hours (plus or minus a minute) by car, according to MapQuest.
